As teens near the college process, parents often spend increasing time thinking about where they would like them to matriculate. All sorts of variables go into that equation, most especially parents’ own high school experiences applying to and attending college. These powerful emotional factors such as personal triumphs, disappointments, and regrets elicit strong parental opinions that can affect students’ calibrations and ultimate decisions on how to choose a college wisely.
That is why it’s wise to consider expert advice about what determines whether students will thrive. Psychologists and educators often describe the match between students and schools as particularly critical. A Wall Street Journal article, “The Right Way to Choose a College,” delves more into research that can best guide parents.
Psychologist Denise Pope, for example, offers recommendations based on her and her colleagues’ research at Stanford University. Most notably, their findings debunk any correlation between how selective a college is and graduates’ later job satisfaction or well being. It is simply untrue that where teens attend school determines their future happiness.
What does matter, of course, is what students do when they are in college. No matter how prestigious the university where they matriculate, if they coast (or sleep) through classes, they will hardly get the full benefits of their education. In contrast, being fully engaged in learning as well as in the campus community pays dividends. Dr. Pope cites a series of Gallup-Purdue studies that suggest six specific college experiences associated with students thriving after graduation and feeling fulfilled as employees:
- Taking a course with a professor who makes learning exciting
- Working with professors who personally care about students
- Finding a mentor who encourages students to pursue personal goals
- Working on a project across several semesters
- Participating in an internship that applies classroom learning
- Actively participating in extracurricular activities
These valuable experiences can be achieved at various educational institutions. And yet, many teens—and parents—persist in aiming for elite universities with name recognition. Recently, a high school student told me that her first choice was Harvard, but she’d “settle for any of the other Ivies.” In teens with lofty aspirations, especially in high-pressure families and communities, this mindset isn’t unusual. But it may well do them a disservice.
If the focus is on Ivies or other highly competitive universities at all costs, students may not investigate schools that would be better matches for them. Some would argue, in fact, that it is easier to develop personal relationships in smaller classes—and with professors rather than teaching assistants. This is the conclusion that Janelle came to after visiting her sister at a well-known Midwestern university. She told me, “I loved that it was a huge rah-rah sports school, but I know it isn’t right for me. I learn best in small classes where I can ask questions and get support if I need it.”
Nadia also knew herself well enough to realize that she wasn’t ready to live on her own at a four-year university. To free herself from everyday responsibilities and get the most out of her experience, she decided on a respected community college that offered the opportunities she was looking for. Students like Janelle and Nadia are far more likely to thrive academically, socially, and emotionally—which is what facilitates the ability to remain at college, use their time productively, and graduate well prepared for work.